


Accidental Cat Burglar

by Cuzosu



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Breaking and Entering, Drunkenness, M/M, kind of meet-cute
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-29
Updated: 2018-07-29
Packaged: 2019-06-18 01:30:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,261
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15474513
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cuzosu/pseuds/Cuzosu
Summary: Obi-Wan wakes up to a drunken intruder who steals his cat's affection. It's kind of hard to be mad about it.





	Accidental Cat Burglar

**Author's Note:**

  * For [jynx](https://archiveofourown.org/users/jynx/gifts), [sanerontheinside](https://archiveofourown.org/users/sanerontheinside/gifts).



> For this prompt:  
> “You broke into my apartment drunk thinking it was your friend’s house and I should call the cops but my cat kinda likes you so we’re good”  
> I didn't quite follow the prompt, but...pretty close. ;)

Obi-Wan jerked awake on the couch at the sound of someone clumsily forcing entry into his apartment. Groggy with fatigue that didn't want to leave him, he slid a hand between the cushions to snag one of the emergency weapons: a length of steel pipe he'd tucked away within a week of acquiring his furniture.

When the intruder spooked his cat, tripped over his own feet and nearly brained himself in the fall, the redhead sighed and got up. “Either you're incompetent or drunk,” he noted dryly. “Most people notice the attention-grabbing cat  _ before  _ she can get annoyed enough to swat them.” Whoever the blond was, he'd successfully broken and entered while he was three sheets to the wind. If it weren't so annoying, Obi-Wan would even have been impressed. 

The blond blinked and frowned at shadowed calico fur. “Don' have a cat,” he muttered, gruff and baffled. “An' where’s Codes?” He squinted up for long enough to realize the posture made his head pound, then groaned and curled into a ball. Xena, contrary feline that she was, crept out of hiding to investigate the newcomer.

Footsteps echoed down the hall, accompanied by someone calling lowly, “Rex? Rex, damn it, if you get arrested for stupid shit while intoxicated, I will  _ never  _ let you live it down and Dad will get  _ every. Detail!”  _

Another groan, this one more pitiful; Xena had shoved her way half into the intruder's lap and was purring so loud Obi-Wan heard it from five feet out. It was unusual behavior for her. She rarely liked any visitors except his friends, and even Anakin's attempts to pet her were often rebuffed with a hint of claws.

A longer look proved the blond had muscle and tattoos—and was so utterly wasted that even sitting on his ass, hunched in on himself, his balance wavered. The redhead frowned, concerned, and called out just loud enough to be heard in the hall, “If you're looking for a drunk blond somewhere he shouldn't be, we're in 17B.”

“Oh, for fuck's sake,” growled the other man, and his footsteps gained speed and purpose as he strode toward the door into the apartment. “Don't suppose I could get you to help me get him to  _ his  _ apartment? Dumbass will probably squirm free again if—”

Movement halted the conversation. The blond slumped over on the floor and began snoring, shirt riding up his flank. Xena curled happily in the space between his torso and the floor, warm and with a human whose attention she wanted. 

There was a moment's consideration and then the brunet huffed and crossed his arms, glaring down at the drunk. “Brothers,” he bit out. “Drag you out because they need a designated driver, then pull stupid shit.”

Obi-Wan eyed them both for a few seconds longer, then asked, “How likely is he to wake up if we move him?”

“Almost guaranteed,” growled the sober sibling.

_ Hope I don't regret this later.  _ “I have a spare room,” the redhead offered, rubbing his beard thoughtfully. “He might wake up to my cat, but I work from home so he doesn't have to be out early.” Then he held up a finger, walked over to a computer desk set in the middle of several cat trees, and pulled a business card from a drawer. Returning, he held it out with a wry smile. “Obi-Wan Kenobi. If you're not working, come over for breakfast or lunch and we can tease your brother.”

The brunet couldn't help smiling in return, slow and almost disbelieving. “You like him.” Kenobi, struck speechless for the first time since they'd met, blushed and kept silent, but met his gaze. He grinned. “Oh, yeah, Rex is  _ never  _ going to live this down. I'm Cody, by the way. Cody Fett.” A quick glance at his wrist watch. “Don't suppose there's room for another somewhere, here? My place is an hour from here and my shift starts at nine, but I'd like to check on my brother before I head in for work.”

“Bed's a queen—blame that on friends that think drinking means everyone crashes at my place—or there's the couch, if you'd rather.”

“Which one will net me less cat hair?” 

_ For a man with such an active sense of humor, he's got one hell of a poker face,  _ Obi-Wan mused.  _ I like him. And his brother's hot, so I kind of hope he's not an ass in the morning. _ “Couch,” he admitted. “Blankets on the bed give her a regular hiding place, but the spare bedding I keep in the closet and that's used more as a storage room; my clothes hang in the laundry room or end up in the dresser.”

Cody leveled a long, assessing look at him. “Huh,” he finally said. “Kind of had you pegged for a bit of a peacock.”

“If you'd met my brother or his girlfriend, you'd never accuse me of having anything resembling fashion sense,” grinned the redhead. “Let's get—Rex, you said?” The brunet nodded. “Let's get Rex in bed and then I'll grab you blankets, and if you need a shower, all the towels are clean.” He eyed the other man. “If you want your clothes washed so you don't reek of alcohol tomorrow, I think some of the stuff my friend Garen's left over here might fit you for the night?”

“That would be helpful,” agreed Cody, grinning. “Thanks.” 

They bent down to pick up the blond, still smiling, and when Rex was safely in bed, the cat jumped up and tucked herself against his side. Getting themselves set for bed was an easier process.

  
  
  


Rex woke to a pounding head on a mattress too firm to be his own; his had a mattress pad to keep springs from poking him.  _ Where am I?  _ He remembered going out of his way to annoy Cody, several hours into the night. Probably not his best move, but what were brothers for?

His bladder made itself known, so he tossed the blankets off and stumbled his way out of the room, leaning heavily on the wall and cursing his drinking habits. The bathroom was tidy, too much so to belong to anyone he knew except Cody, but this definitely wasn’t Cody’s apartment. Someone had also, he noted, left out a variety of pain pills in their proper containers with an unopened bottle of water. Rex was even more confused. Who the hell would his brother have left him with? Not even Kix would have had enough sympathy to let him sleep off the worst of the hangover.

A short time later, head soaked but feeling better, pills downed and water bottle empty, Rex took a breath.  _ Time to face the music.  _ If he was lucky, Cody was still asleep or had passed out somewhere else.

The blond stepped out of the bathroom and almost walked right into the redhead leaning on a wall, waiting for him. “Uh.”  _ Way to sound intelligent, dumbass,  _ he cursed himself. “Hi?”  _ Sorry I got drunk and ended up here, and I really hope I didn’t hit on you while I was wasted because I kind of want you to take it seriously when I flirt sober? _

Smiling only made the man even more attractive. “Your brother left a note on the table for you and there’s breakfast on the stove if you want it.” He pushed off the wall and walked away.

Rex stared after him.  _ Damn, that’s a nice ass.  _ “Thanks?” That was not supposed to have been a question. “Uh, any chance of a shower later?” He could figure out where the hell he was afterward, if he found his phone.  _ Why is he amused? Most people want a shower after they spend a night getting shitfaced. _ But he followed the other man over to the kitchen and helped himself when he spotted the plate and silverware on the counter.  _ Bacon, eggs, toast, and hashbrowns. Hearty food to settle the stomach. Thoughtful.  _ “Thanks,” he said again, this time with more gratitude behind it.

“...ah, I suppose you can use my shower? Or you can go however many doors or floors it is to your own apartment and shower where you have clean clothes? And you’re welcome, though it wasn’t really any trouble.”

_ What?  _ “We’re...in the same building?” He shoveled another hefty bite in his mouth and groaned his appreciation.  _ Fuck. Sexy and cooks? Cody will never let me live this down. _

“That’s what your brother said, after you broke into my apartment last night.” Expressive eyes gleamed with mischief...and maybe a little more.

“I  _ what?!”  _ Rex choked, wincing.  _ Augh, food down the wrong pipe! _ “I’m sorry. And I know it’s not an excuse, but I was drunk off my ass. Worse than I thought, apparently.” He tried a sheepish smile, hand rising to rub the back of his head where his brother would have smacked him already. Any of his brothers.  _ Phantom pain, just what I needed…. _ “Do I need to repair anything?”

That question garnered only more open amusement. “Not unless you plan on breaking in again, in which case I’d rather give you a copy of my key.”

Heat flooded his face. The only way this could have been more embarrassing was if his family were here. “Wasn’t in my plans to begin with. You said Cody was here? Didn’t he try to get me home?” His blush worsened when he found he couldn’t keep his eyes off the other man, even when he was unable to meet his gaze. It was probably a good thing he’d already polished off most of his plate.

“We meant to,” grinned the redhead. “You fell asleep on my floor before we could and we decided it was easier if you took the spare bed and Cody borrowed my couch.”

_ So Cody didn’t just up and leave me with a stranger.  _ It shouldn’t have mattered that his brother trusted someone he barely met well enough to leave Rex sleeping off a night of drinking while he went to work, but for  _ Cody  _ to trust the man that much? Now Rex wanted to know why. “That’s...uncommonly nice of you.” 

The redhead shrugged. “You’re hot. I wanted to see if you’d be the kind of person I’d enjoy dating when you weren’t drunk off your ass and trying to figure out when you’d ended up with a cat.”

A surprised grin fought the blush on his face. “You think I’m hot?”

“Cheeky, aren’t you?” laughed the other man. “We haven’t even been introduced yet!”

Blush fading, Rex leered. “I’m sure I could convince you to tell me your name.”

“Miao!” The table shook as a calico cat jumped on it, then sauntered easily over to the blond. Her head shoved against his wrist and one pointed ear nearly ended up in his plate.

“Oh, I see how it is!” Open amusement creased the other’s face. “You break into my apartment and steal my cat’s affection, so it’s  _ clearly  _ fine to steal my heart, too?”

_ Corny, sweet, hot as hell, has humor, apparently someone Cody will trust on short notice without having known him before.  _ It was breaking Rex’s brain, but all he wanted was more. He even wanted more of the cat, because it brought more of the redhead’s affection.

“Obi-Wan Kenobi,” the other man finally told him. “And unfortunately for you, your brother already knows I like you.”

_ Oh, fuck.  _ That was going to bite him in the ass.  _ Though I think he’ll be worth it.  _ If he’d known Obi-Wan lived so close to him, known how much he’d like what he knew of the man so far, he wouldn’t have had to be drunk to wind up in his lap. Or vice versa, if the redhead wasn’t opposed. “So, if I asked you to give me time to get cleaned up and then go on a date with me, what would you say?”

Smirk lighting his face, Obi-Wan purred, “If you ask nicely, I might even put out on the first date.”

_ It’s not fair that he’s so damn sexy.  _ Rex was losing his mind. Still, it was going to be a wild ride.

The cat went still as she spotted something, then shot across the table to bat at it.

“Xena!” Obi-Wan yelped and rose, rushing to get the paper she’d targeted away from her. His efforts had only limited success; she followed it back to the blond as the paper changed hands.

“Your brother’s note,” explained Kenobi. “Which you should probably read.”

Rex sighed. “Probably,” he agreed. “But I meant it, about the date.” Absentmindedly, he scratched the cat with one hand and tucked the paper into a pocket with the other.

“Good. So did I.”

They traded smiles, anticipation lighting the air. Ten minutes later, after a parting where neither of them wanted to separate, Rex was back in his apartment, about to shower. He glanced at the note in his hand, then shrugged and set it on the counter. If it had been about the redhead, Cody wouldn’t have left it on the kitchen table. Probably teasing of some sort.

Instead of reading it, the blond stripped everything off and started the shower. He had a date!

As steam soaked paper and ink ran, words became illegible.

_      I have new blackmail material on your drunk ass. _

_      Also? Fives says Kenobi beat him in a prank war. _

_      Living dangerously, don’t you think? B&E a _

_      prankster’s place? Just don’t steal the cat. _

_      I’ll call you after work. _

_      Cody _


End file.
